God Talks to Pat Robertson: "Ask Her About Her Sex Life"

I heard the icky audio clip of Pat Robertson describing his conversation with god on AirAmerica radio this morning. It's from the interview with Rita Braver on CBS's Sunday Morning program.

RB:
What-- what's the basic thesis of your book?
PR:
Well the basic thesis is that there's a god in heaven who is all powerful who wants to help people. And that-- he will answer prayer, and does miraculous things in people's lives. And so I've documented some of these wonderful things.

I've-- I've had one woman-- African-American woman raised from the dead. She was stone cold dead, and her prayers of her church brought her back to life. Another woman was a spastic quadriplegic from the time--
RB:
These are [] things you've been particularly personally involved in? Or just--
PR:
Well-- some of us-- have-- the-- these stories that we've carried on our television. And-- (COUGHS) our producers have done it. I-- they're-- they're not-- what I think-- involved in prayers that I gave spec-- specifically. But-- they have really-- they're heartwarming. They're just bring tears to your eyes, some of these things. And they're-- they're--
RB:
You know you-- you talk about-- a couple very specific cases in the book that []you say you were personally involved in. You tell the story of-- being on a trip to the Holy Land, and some people coming to you and asking you if you can help a woman with severe asthma.
PR:
That's right.
RB:
And you say-- that God spoke to you and--
PR:
Well--
RB:
--told you--
PR:
--well it wudn't (PH) quite that way. Well-- well anyhow, they thought she was demon possessed. And these women are in the conference, and they said, "Go cast demons out of her." And I ignored it and ate dinner and went on to the meeting.

And then the next night, they had moved this poor woman out of the hotel. She was crying out for mercy and saying, "Oh God, help me," because she had such bad asthma. So-- I had to go see her. But fortunately I had my wife with her, so we went to another hotel-- in the heart of Jerusalem and knocked on the door.

And here, this haunting woman, she looked like-- she really looked like she was terrified-- very attractive-- striking brunette, 45 years old, you know thin, 5'8" kinda thing. And-- she had this look in her eyes. And-- so I went in, and my wife was with me. And they took the two chairs and I sat on the bed.

And I said, "Tell me about your problem." And she said, "I've got this asthma." And I said, "Have you been to the (LAUGHTER) doctor?" And-- and she said, "Yes. The doctor said my asthma was caused by praying with nuns." And I said, (LAUGHTER) "A doctor?"
RB:
That sounds--
PR:
"A doctor?"
RB:
--that sounds like-- (LAUGHTER) you should've advised her, "Maybe go see another doctor."
PR:
There was-- (LAUGHTER) well see-- the-- "A doctor told you this?" (UNINTEL) said, "Yes, that's what my doctor told me." And I says, "There is no way that praying with nuns is gonna cause you-- asthma." And then I prayed. And I said, "Lord, what's wrong with her?" I just prayed silently. And the Lord said, "Ask about her sex life." And--
RB:
The-- the Lord said that to you?
PR:
Yes, He said that to me. And I said, "There's no way I'm going to ask a strange woman about her sex life." So I said-- (COUGHS) "Excuse me for-- being personal, but would you tell me about your marriage."

She said, "Oh, I have a wonderful marriage." I said, "You do?" She (UNINTEL PHRASE), "A wonderful husband, wonderful marriage. It's just absolutely marvelous." I said, "You do?" She said, "Yes." So I prayed again. (LAUGHTER) I said, "Lord, what's the matter?" And she-- He said, "Ask her about her sex life."
RB:
I-- it's hard to imagine the Lord--
PR:
The-- the--
RB:
--saying this to you--
PR:
--the Lord say-- well He did. And I-- and I said-- "You know, please forgive me if I'm being personal, but tell me about your sex life." And she said, "I don't have any." And I said, "Well, I thought you had a wonderful marriage." And she said-- "I do, but I don't have any sex life."

And I said, "How long has that been going on?" And she said, "Two years." And I said-- "And that's when your asthma started, isn't it?" And she said, "Yes." And I said, "Well it's obvious that you're blaming yourself-- for this condition. What's the problem?" And she said, "My husband's impotent."

And I said, "You think it's your fault." And she said, "Yes. It's-- I think it's my fault." And I said, "Well it isn't your fault. And it may be that he's working too hard. He may be having a physical impairment. But-- there's something in his life, that this isn't your fault." And she said, "It's not?"

I said, "Absolutely not." And I said, "Okay, now let's pray for your asthma. And she said, "Okay." And we prayed. And God healed her asthma just like that.

Here's the link to the CBS story and video. Turn down your volume before you click the video link; it has a hideous full-volume commercial before the clip.